As a kid I grew up very lonely, visions of spirits and the great cosmic void both haunted me and kept me company at night. I had more imaginary friends than real ones. But the one I did have never left my side. I am grateful for that.

 

I was raised by parents who were older than most, giving me a home of financial stability, but minds were still filled with “I am not worthy” and riddled in scarcity. I was one of those babies that was left in the crib to cry numerous times. They were taught that I should be able to soothe my own emotions and mind. 

 

I was bullied at school by both the girls and the boys. Now looking back I realize that I made them all uncomfortable with my light. They didn't like that I could see what was hidden behind their eyes. I grew up as lonely as one could be, and I hoped that someone, anyone would love me.

 

The constant rejections and projections I felt from the world formed my identity and built a cast iron cage around me. It became a comfort zone of illusive safety. I believed that if I took on their pain there would be a place for me in their world, and maybe they would love me. I lost myself completely.

 

I had eating disorders, body dysmorphia, a face full of acne, and my inner fire dwindled to a mear single coal. All I wanted was to be loved by somebody. So I dated and slept with people I shouldn’t have, tried to be friends with the people who abused me, and internalized all their pain and made it my identity. 

 

Then one day, by divine synchronicity, I found myself in my first yoga class, and everything started changing. I started to love myself enough to break down the walls around me and I set myself free from my cage of illusive safety. Over the course of 5 years I rekindled my inner flame and burned down everything, and recreated who I am today. 

 

I sold and gave up everything I owned, I even changed my name. I took a 3 year long vow of celibacy and rediscovered who I came here to be. During these years, I gathered everything I could into what is now the very full medicine basket of my souls eternal work. I learned every modality of healing that crossed my path and applied it to myself vigorously. 

 

This is the story of how my medicine woman came to be. The learning and application of each healing modality has shaped me. Each practice over the past decade slowly unraveling the conditioning it took on as my identity, and returned my back to my original soul blueprint. It was all part of my destiny, not one piece of my story wasn't meant for me. 

The Medicine Woman is the one that tends to your heart along your journey back to yourself. She is the nature in the process. The one that restores what has been broken, uncovers that which has been hidden and forgotten. She is the one that mends your separation back to your original wholeness.